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  • The Biography of Mr. Almost Hu Shi

The Biography of Mr. Almost Hu Shi

By 故事大全 | 2025-09-22 09:24:47

Do you know who the most famous person in China is? Mention this individual, and everyone knows him; his fame is everywhere. His surname is Cha, his given name is Buduo ("Not Much"), and he hails from every province, county, and village. You must have met him, and certainly heard others talk about him. Mr. Almost's name is on everyone's lips every day, because he is the representative of the entire Chinese people.

Mr. Almost's appearance is much like yours and mine. He has two eyes, but his vision isn't very clear; he has two ears, but his hearing isn't very sharp; he has a nose and mouth, but he doesn't pay much attention to smells or tastes; his brain isn't small, but his memory isn't very sharp, nor is his thinking very meticulous.

He often says: "Anything is fine as long as it's almost right. Why be so precise?"

When he was young, his mother sent him to buy brown sugar, but he came back with white sugar. His mother scolded him, and he shook his head, saying: "Aren't brown sugar and white sugar almost the same?"

When he was at school, his teacher asked him: "Which province lies to the west of Zhili Province?" He answered, "Shaanxi." The teacher said, "Wrong. It's Shanxi, not Shaanxi." He replied, "Aren't Shaanxi and Shanxi almost the same?"

Later, he worked as a shop clerk. He could write and calculate, but was never accurate—often writing the character for "ten" (十) as "thousand" (千), or "thousand" as "ten." The shopkeeper would get angry and scold him, but he would just smile apologetically and say: "The character for 'thousand' only has one extra stroke compared to 'ten.' Isn't that almost the same?"

One day, he had an urgent matter and needed to catch a train to Shanghai. He strolled calmly to the railway station, arriving two minutes late—the train had already left. He stared blankly at the distant smoke from the train, shaking his head: "I'll just have to go tomorrow instead. Going today or tomorrow is almost the same anyway. But the railway company is being too strict. 8:30 departure and 8:32 departure—aren't they almost the same?" As he spoke, he slowly walked home, never quite understanding why the train couldn't wait just two minutes for him.

One day, he suddenly fell seriously ill and quickly told his family to fetch Dr. Wang from East Street. In a hurry, the family member ran off, but couldn't find Dr. Wang from East Street and instead brought Dr. Wang the cattle doctor from West Street. Lying ill in bed, Mr. Almost knew they had found the wrong doctor, but he was in great pain, anxious and desperate. He couldn't wait, so he thought: "Fortunately, Dr. Wang the cattle doctor and Dr. Wang the physician are almost the same—let him try." So the cattle doctor approached the bed and treated Mr. Almost using the methods for healing cows. Within less than an hour, Mr. Almost breathed his last.

As Mr. Almost was nearly dead, he gasped out in a broken voice: "The living and the dead are al-al-al-most the same... As long as everything is al-al-al-most right... it'll be f-f-fine... Why... why... be so... so... serious?" Having spoken this maxim, he finally breathed his last.

After his death, everyone praised Mr. Almost for being broad-minded and understanding. They all said he had never been serious, never kept accounts, never quibbled—truly a virtuous man. So they gave him a posthumous title, calling him Master Yuantong (Master of Easy Accommodation).

His reputation spread farther and wider, growing greater with time. Countless people followed his example. Thus, everyone became a Mr. Almost—and China thereby became a nation of lazy people.

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